Saturday, July 28, 2007

Wallpaper Is The Devil

This morning I decided that I'd finally take on the task of removing the wallpaper (seen in the picture above on the wall to the left) from the room that I previously used as a home theater. When I had a projector set up I painted the walls, ceiling and pretty much everything except for the carpet black. Now that I'm trying to sell my house I thought that it would be better to make the room look a bit more normal. It seemed like the logical first place to start was to remove the black wallpaper that was in the room when I bought the house; I removed 1 strip of wallpaper before giving up. It took me an hour to remove that 1 strip. It was the shortest strip in the room.

Wallpaper is evil. There is no doubt about that. If you are a parent, PLEASE teach your children of the evils of wallpaper abuse. There is NO good reason to ever dabble in this Dark Art. If you think that you should use wallpaper in your home, please stop and ask yourself these questions first:

1) Would I enjoy walking on a fresh carpet of broken glass shards?
2) Do I have a deep and profound hatred of my fellow Man?
3) Do I enjoy taking the longest, slowest, most traffic light congested route to work?
4) When I wake up in the morning, do I wish I had less sleep?
5) Do I often hope that the dentist will forget to use Novacaine when I have a tooth drilled?

If you answered 'yes' to 5 of those questions, wallpaper MAY be worth considering. You should stop by your nearest Home Depot and pick up a roll on the way to your therapist.

Removing that 1 strip of wallpaper was a good experience, though. It helped me realize that I have reached a point in my life where I have no patience to do things that I really have no interest in doing (and that I can pay someone else to do). I called for professional help and I'll leave the task of 'normalizing' my old home theater to hands other than mine. My free time is too important to me to spend it on chores like this.


SqueakyClef said...

I could have told you the trick to removing wallpaper. :-) Oh well.

Jeff said...

Cough it up, Squeaky. Share your trick with us!